The Outspoken Clitic

(something witty here)

 

Problems in Real Life January 11, 2010

Filed under: Sad face — Toygirl @ 3:44 pm

OK, so posting here has been a little sparse as of late.  There have been some unfortunate circumstances in my life and at the moment I need to focus most of my energy elsewhere.  Just for a little while, though, and then I’ll be back in full force with some upgrades, some new content, tons of new reviews, and a visual overhaul.

So, to those of you I owe reviews: they’re coming!  I haven’t forgotten about anyone.

Just keep your fingers crossed for me that everything works out.

 
 

Holy Crap You Guys, Epiphora is giving away a Romp

Filed under: Contest — Toygirl @ 3:34 pm

RompMora

Seriously, she’s giving away a Nobessence Romp.  The Romp pictured to the left, to be exact.  This is crazy-awesome.  Head on over and check it out!  There are multiple ways to enter.

 
 

Review: Mini Gallant for Babeland January 6, 2010

Filed under: Fun Factory, Review, babeland — Toygirl @ 6:19 pm



funfactory-meany

The Fun Factory Mini Gallant (elsewhere called the Meany) is part of the Fun Factory line of smaller traditional vibes.  It’s about 5.5 inches long (with 4.5 of that being insertable silicone) and  1.125 inches in diameter (it’s a little wider near the base).  The top inch of the toy is silicone all the way through, so is softer and squishier than the rest of the toy (which has mechanical innards in the middle).  As you can see from the photo, there are three ridges on the front of the toy that provide some texture.  The Fun Factory silicone is, as usual, extremely pliable and smooth.  With the exception of the battery cap, which I’ll discuss below, the Mini Gallant is very solidly constructed.

So that’s form.  What about function?  The Mini Gallant takes 2 AAAs, so it’s not the most powerful thing in the world.  It’s most powerful around the base, and even on high settings it’s pretty quiet.  There’s a range of constant vibration settings (low to high) that you access by pushing the + button.  Once you get to the highest constant vibration setting, pushing the + button gets you to the three pulse patterns:

1) zzZZzz (up and down)

2) zz zz zz (slow pulse)

3) z z z z z  (fast pulse)

Pushing the – button takes you back down to the constant vibrations, and then once you reach the low setting, off.  It’s a pretty intuitive interface, similar to a lot of other Fun Factory toys.

The downfall of this toy is the battery cap.  It’s difficult to align when you’re trying to screw it back into place and lets water in (even though to toy is supposed to be waterproof).  But all in all, the silicone feels pretty nice, and if you don’t need a ton of power, it’s a convenient small vibe that could be good for travel.  Head over to Babeland and check it out!

 
 

Review: Berry Delight for EdenFantasys January 4, 2010

Filed under: Review, edenfantasys — Toygirl @ 4:02 pm
product picture
Egg by Vibratex
Material: Silicone
Safety:
Rating:
Vroom:
Bee:
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer.

Bullet vibes are ubiquitous.  They’re one of the most popular types of sex toy.  And you can see why: they’re small, they’re easy to store, they’re relatively inexpensive, they’re easy to integrate into intercourse, and they’re relatively powerful (at least the ones attached to battery packs are).   The Berry Delight by Vibratex is all of those things plus a healthy dose of fun in the form of silicone nubs and funky lights.

The bullet vibe of the Berry Delight is encased in bright blue silicone with tons of nubs.  The bullet is attached to the battery pack by a thin white cord.  The vibe takes 3 AAAs, making it not *super* powerful for a bullet vibe (I find it to be slightly less powerful than the Bnaughty and the Xtreme Pack, both of which take 2AAs), but it’s head and shoulders above anything powered by watch batteries.  The battery compartment is one of those pull-out dealios, and the base can be a little annoying to twist on and off (it has to be aligned precisely).  The back also has the initials “JDM” imprinted on it, and I’m still not sure what that stands for.

The most fun part about this toy is the aforementioned funky lights.  There’s an on button and an off button (yes!): when you push the on button, the vibe turns on to the first level and the light in between the buttons lights up red.  Push the on button again and you get the second level and a green light!  The light is different for each of the seven vibration levels.  It’s entertaining, trust me.

Level 1: Low (constant), red light

Level 2: Medium (constant), green light

Level 3: High (constant), blue

Level 4: Surging (zzZzZZzzZzZZ), yellow light

Level 5: Pulsating (zz zz zz zz), blue flashing light

Level 6: Escalating (z z z z zzz), purple flashing light

Level 7: Super Surging (zzzzZzzzZZZZ), white light

The names and numbers of the vibration levels are actually listed on the front of the battery pack, so you’ll never forget.  More good news is that the bullet itself can be sterilized (boiling isn’t recommended in this case, 10% bleach solution would do just fine).  So this is a bullet you could happily and safely share.  Don’t use ANY bullet vibes for anal insertion, even if you’ve put it in a condom first.  You probably do want to put this one in a condom for vaginal insertion despite it’s superior material, since the wire connections honestly don’t seem particularly sturdy to me.

The Berry Delight hasn’t unseated either the Xtreme Pack or the Bnaughty as my go-to bullet vibes, but the silicone nubs definitely add some interesting texture and the pattern functions are pretty awesome.  Definitely worth checking out.

 
 

Holiday Wishlist December 15, 2009

Filed under: Varia — Toygirl @ 1:42 pm

Well, finals are now over and I have time to post again!  Somewhat belatedly, I decided to participate in the holiday wishlist meme.

Here are the steps (via Epiphora):

1) Make a post listing your wishes. If you wish for real possible things, make sure you include some sort of contact info.

2) Visit the lists of others. If you see a wish you can grant, and it’s in your heart to do so, make someone’s wish come true.

3) You needn’t spend money on these wishes unless you want to. The point isn’t to put people out, it’s to provide everyone a chance to spread the joy. Gifts can be made anonymously or not — it’s your call.

It’s probably easier for me to just link to her post, since she’s got a list going of other people with wishlists!  Head over and check it out.

My Wishlist:

I’m actually pretty simple this year.  I’m going to be moving again in the spring, so I’m trying not to accumulate as much stuff as in past years.  So:

1) Anything off of my sex toy wishlist (this is always much appreciated).

2) More importantly, I’d like anyone who has experience with trauma and PTSD to let me know that I’m going to feel OK eventually.  I’m really, really struggling at the moment.

That’s pretty much it.  I’m really looking for some hope this holiday season.

Oh, also, if you can make it NOT GET DARK AT 4:15 PM IN BOSTON, that’d be awesome, too.

 
 

Review: Lovemoiselle Cecile for Tabutoys.com November 30, 2009

Filed under: Review, TabuToys — Toygirl @ 3:58 pm

cecile

When I opened up Cecile’s package (sent to me by Tabutoys.com), put the batteries in, twisted the battery cap closed, and pushed the ‘on’ button, I was, quite frankly, a little underwhelmed.  The vibrations just didn’t seem strong enough to do anything for me.  The first thing I did was cycle through the settings with Cecile vibrating away happily (and quietly) in my hand.  I was very happy with the volume level: one imagines that vibrating hard materials will invariably be noisy, but not so with Cecile.  You can’t hear it through a closed door or under covers.

There are 5 settings: the first is a low constant buzz (zzzzz); the second is a slightly stronger constant buzz (ZZZZZ); the third is a constant pulse (zz…zz…zz…zz…zz); the fourth is an escalating variable pulse (zzZzZZ…zz…zz…zz); the fifth is an alternating variable pulse (zzz…z…z…z…zzzzzz).  Holding down the on/off button for two seconds at any point during the cycle turns the vibrator off (a plus in my book; it really annoys me when I have to cycle through all the settings before I get to “off”.  It can be especially terrible if you, like me, live with roommates).  When you turn Cecile back on, the vibrations start back on the first setting.

Ceramic is a truly wonderful material, so allow me to extoll its virtues–it’s hard, completely non-porous, and sterilizable (although I wouldn’t recommend the boiling or dishwasher sterilization methods since Cecile has mechanical parts.  It would definitely end badly, and the demise of such a pretty toy would be a shame).  And while I was initially concerned about vibration strength, that didn’t stop me from admiring other aspects of Cecile.  The ceramic body is smooth and glossy with gentle curves and some pretty purple detailing.  Ceramic is really hard and unyielding, and one of the advantages is that it is very slick and requires very little lube for insertion.

So imagine my surprise when I tried the Cecile and  the vibrations carried through the ceramic deliciously.  Especially the pulsation patterns.  This was, needless to say, an extremely pleasant surprise.  I could take or leave the first two settings (the constant vibration levels), but that last pulsation pattern was heavenly.  If used vaginally, it vaguely mimics thrusting and just generally feels really good.  The vibrations are somewhat diffuse, so Cecile is not the first toy I go to for direct clit stimulation, but that’s OK, since it’s designed as an internal vibrator.  So despite my initial reservations, I really love this toy.

 
 

Pleasurists #54 November 17, 2009

Filed under: pleasurists — Toygirl @ 8:16 am

 

peeking

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
via visualizeus

 

Pleasurists is a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days.

Did you miss Pleasurists #53? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #55? Submit it here before Sunday November 22nd at 11:59pm PST. Please re-post this list on your own blog if listed.

Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

Editor

Scarlet Lotus St. Syr

Editor’s Pick

  • LELO Ella by Victoria
  • People may have no idea just how much pleasure and perfect g-spot stimulation that unassuming hunk of silicone provides. (Those fools!)

    Also, you may want to use Ella as a pretend phone, or let your other toys argue with your cats about it. Just a little suggestion of my own.

    Note: While there were many wonderful reviews this week and the EP was a difficult choice I was won over by the wonderfully amusing and fantastic pictures that accompany this review. Talk bubbles, kitties, and attempts to use a sex toy as a phone (among other amusing antics) set the review apart while the text gives you more of the usual toy information. I love it.

On to the reviews…

Vibrators

Dildos

Anal Toys

Toys for Cocks

Lube, Massage Oil, Bath Stuff, & etc.

BDSM/Fetish

Adult Books/Games

Adult Movies/Porn

Lingerie

Storage

Miscellaneous

 

Pleasurists adult product review round-up banner

 
 

Review: Tantus G-Force for TabuToys November 15, 2009

Filed under: Review, TabuToys — Toygirl @ 6:32 pm

gforce-wine

I’m going to ruin the ending for you: the Tantus G-force is a big almost.  I was completely prepared to love it, as I do all of the Tantus toys I’ve had the good fortune to try.  But the second I pulled it out of its packaging, I was seized by trepidation.  Geeze, I thought, this thing is FLOPPY. As someone who requires very firm toys for effective g-spot stimulation, I was troubled: would this be the first Tantus toy that didn’t do it for me?  Was I going to have to write a negative review of A TANTUS TOY?!  C’nest pas possible, I thought.  I may have actually thought this in French, since I like the way it sounds.

To be sure, there’s a lot to love about the G-Force: it’s 100% silicone, it’s a pretty, deep wine color, it’s got a super comfy ergonomic grip handle with the Tantus logo stamped into the base.  It has all the quality and hallmarks we have all come to expect from Tantus.  But how would it perform?  I just kept holding it by its handle, flopping it around.  I could bend the head to touch the base with very little force, which was not, as they say, a good sign.

The shape is GREAT.  I inserted it with a little lube and it seemed to lock in on my g-spot immediately, like it was magnetically attracted there.  The handle is long, so I didn’t have to strain my short-ass arms or contort myself in any sort of awkward way to use the toy.  This is definitely a plus in my book, as my arms are very short.

Alas, it was as I had initially feared: the silicone was too floppy to provide the sort of g-spot stimulation I need.  The head itself is firm without much give, but the neck and handle are much more flexible, making it difficult to apply enough pressure to the required spots.  The handle just bends instead of transmitting the force onto the g-spot.  Frustrating.  The other problem is that the head and shaft aren’t particularly girthy, so not only could I not apply sufficient pressure to my g-spot, but I didn’t feel particularly filled up, either.  Frustrating.

The upshot: I’m saddened to have found the first Tantus toy that wasn’t 100% wow for me.  But for people who don’t require super-hard material or a good deal of pressure to please their g-spot, this toy would work really well.  Check it out and get your own at TabuToys.

 
 

Domina Doll’s Luxury Sex Toy Scavenger Hunt!

Filed under: Contest — Toygirl @ 12:51 pm

Domina Doll (over at popmycherryreview.com), in collaboration with TabuToys, is hosting a pretty cool contest: she’s posting questions every week for six weeks. One winner from among all those who get all the answers correct will be chosen! The prizes up for grabs include a Lelo Elise and a Fun Factory/Intimate Organics grab bag!

Domina Doll:

How To Enter

This is how this contest is going to work. It is a sexy scavenger hunt that will run for six weeks. Each Sunday starting today, Nov 1st 2009 until Dec 6th 2009 I will post clues here on my blog and you must go on a scavenger hunt to find the answers. The contest closes on Dec 12th 2009, and all answers /entries must be emailed to domina @ fatalefemmes (dot) com by 12am PST. You may send your answers to me each week or all at once before the contest deadline. You can enter the contest even in the middle or end of it as long as it is before the deadline as I will have links to each week’s previous clue in each post.

You must answer all questions correctly in all six of each week’s posts in order to qualify. So I recommend that you add my blog to your FEED READER, or add me on TWITTER, to remind you to enter each week and make sure you get ALL THE CLUES!

One winner who has answered all the questions correctly will be chosen randomly by a Random Number Generator and the WINNER will be posted on my blog by Dec 13th. Their prizes will then be sent to them via post the next day (Dec 14th), so if you win you will need to supply your address so we can send you your prizes.

Fine Print- Sorry, but the contest is only open to people in the continental US.

Increase Your Chances!

You can increase your chances of winning by:

Reposting the contest guidelines on your blog with a link back to this post. (make sure you let me know you did this by leaving a comment on this post!)
Retweeting the contest on Twitter.

 
 

Wilhelmina Wang’s Gender Carnival

Filed under: Contest — Toygirl @ 12:41 pm

Wilhelmina Wang is giving away a bunch of goodies.  Quoth Wilhelmina:

 

What does your gender mean to YOU?

This might seem like too much of a queer-centric contest, but even if you don’t play with your gender necessarily, I’m sure you still have feelings about your gender.

Lately, I’ve been thinking about my own gender more, and while appear mostly feminine, I often wish that I could wake up and just pick whatever gender I wanted to be that day, and be it. Soon I’m going to be doing a series of posts/HNTs exploring my own gender(fucking), and I’m really looking forward to reading about other people’s takes on gender. I thought combining a shout out for feedback with a contest would be cool.

How to Enter:

To enter, you need to do two things:

  1. Leave a comment on this post in response to the question: What does your gender mean to you?
  2. Spread the word about the contest! Either reblog or retweet. Or both, if you wish. If you’re reblogging, exact text would be best (don’t hotlink to the images, though), and you can add your own words to it. Link to the blog post in a comment. You can only do this a minimum of once. If you’re retweeting, do so at least once and a maximum of ten times, and use the following text: RT @wilhelminawang What does your gender mean to you? Answer and win some sex toys! http://bit.ly/LOBoZ
  3. (Optional) Subscribe to my RSS feed and let me know in your comment that you have :)

Each comment, reblog and retweet will earn you one “entry” into the contest, and after all the entries are in I’ll use a randomizer to select the winner :) Yep, only one winner this time.

Deadline to enter: November 21st, midnight, EST.

The Fine Print:

Tabu Toys & Tantus are only willing to ship within the continental US. If you’re not in the continental US, you can still enter, but if you win I will request that you cover shipping costs because otherwise I’ll have to pay for it out of my own pocket. You can pay for the costs via PayPal.

She’s giving away an Emotional Bliss Femblossom Heat, a Tantus Ryder, and a Lelo Bo!  Head over and enter!