The Outspoken Clitic

OK, so posting here has been a little sparse as of late.  There have been some unfortunate circumstances in my life and at the moment I need to focus most of my energy elsewhere.  Just for a little while, though, and then I’ll be back in full force with some upgrades, some new content, tons of new reviews, and a visual overhaul.

So, to those of you I owe reviews: they’re coming!  I haven’t forgotten about anyone.

Just keep your fingers crossed for me that everything works out.

Seriously, she’s giving away a Nobessence Romp.  The Romp pictured to the left, to be exact.  This is crazy-awesome.  Head on over and check it out!  There are multiple ways to enter.

The Fun Factory Mini Gallant (elsewhere called the Meany) is part of the Fun Factory line of smaller traditional vibes.  It’s about 5.5 inches long (with 4.5 of that being insertable silicone) and  1.125 inches in diameter (it’s a little wider near the base).  The top inch of the toy is silicone all the way through, so is softer and squishier than the rest of the toy (which has mechanical innards in the middle).  As you can see from the photo, there are three ridges on the front of the toy that provide some texture.  The Fun Factory silicone is, as usual, extremely pliable and smooth.  With the exception of the battery cap, which I’ll discuss below, the Mini Gallant is very solidly constructed.

So that’s form.  What about function?  The Mini Gallant takes 2 AAAs, so it’s not the most powerful thing in the world.  It’s most powerful around the base, and even on high settings it’s pretty quiet.  There’s a range of constant vibration settings (low to high) that you access by pushing the + button.  Once you get to the highest constant vibration setting, pushing the + button gets you to the three pulse patterns:

1) zzZZzz (up and down)

2) zz zz zz (slow pulse)

3) z z z z z  (fast pulse)

Pushing the – button takes you back down to the constant vibrations, and then once you reach the low setting, off.  It’s a pretty intuitive interface, similar to a lot of other Fun Factory toys.

The downfall of this toy is the battery cap.  It’s difficult to align when you’re trying to screw it back into place and lets water in (even though to toy is supposed to be waterproof).  But all in all, the silicone feels pretty nice, and if you don’t need a ton of power, it’s a convenient small vibe that could be good for travel.  Head over to Babeland and check it out!

Berry delight Egg by Vibratex Material: Silicone Safety: $32.99 Buy from EdenFantasys
Rating:	Vroom:	Bee:
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer.

Bullet vibes are ubiquitous.  They’re one of the most popular types of sex toy.  And you can see why: they’re small, they’re easy to store, they’re relatively inexpensive, they’re easy to integrate into intercourse, and they’re relatively powerful (at least the ones attached to battery packs are).   The Berry Delight by Vibratex is all of those things plus a healthy dose of fun in the form of silicone nubs and funky lights.

The bullet vibe of the Berry Delight is encased in bright blue silicone with tons of nubs.  The bullet is attached to the battery pack by a thin white cord.  The vibe takes 3 AAAs, making it not *super* powerful for a bullet vibe (I find it to be slightly less powerful than the Bnaughty and the Xtreme Pack, both of which take 2AAs), but it’s head and shoulders above anything powered by watch batteries.  The battery compartment is one of those pull-out dealios, and the base can be a little annoying to twist on and off (it has to be aligned precisely).  The back also has the initials “JDM” imprinted on it, and I’m still not sure what that stands for.

The most fun part about this toy is the aforementioned funky lights.  There’s an on button and an off button (yes!): when you push the on button, the vibe turns on to the first level and the light in between the buttons lights up red.  Push the on button again and you get the second level and a green light!  The light is different for each of the seven vibration levels.  It’s entertaining, trust me.

Level 1: Low (constant), red light

Level 2: Medium (constant), green light

Level 3: High (constant), blue

Level 4: Surging (zzZzZZzzZzZZ), yellow light

Level 5: Pulsating (zz zz zz zz), blue flashing light

Level 6: Escalating (z z z z zzz), purple flashing light

Level 7: Super Surging (zzzzZzzzZZZZ), white light

The names and numbers of the vibration levels are actually listed on the front of the battery pack, so you’ll never forget.  More good news is that the bullet itself can be sterilized (boiling isn’t recommended in this case, 10% bleach solution would do just fine).  So this is a bullet you could happily and safely share.  Don’t use ANY bullet vibes for anal insertion, even if you’ve put it in a condom first.  You probably do want to put this one in a condom for vaginal insertion despite it’s superior material, since the wire connections honestly don’t seem particularly sturdy to me.

The Berry Delight hasn’t unseated either the Xtreme Pack or the Bnaughty as my go-to bullet vibes, but the silicone nubs definitely add some interesting texture and the pattern functions are pretty awesome.  Definitely worth checking out.