Well, I’m back from break, and since my university is one of the few that has finals *after* break, I have returned to a long, painful slog of text production. That’s right: papers. Like, six of them.
Urgh. Wish me luck. I’m sure I’ll be around plenty (procrastination!!!).
Bswish’s Bnaughty is my first bullet vibe! I bought it in black and it looks quite classy.
User’s manual stuff: the Bnaughty comes in the traditional Bswish box: sleek, and with a stylish photo on the cover of the product inside. The Bnaughty comes with a black cotton drawstring bag for storage. It takes 2 AA batteries and is made of plastic: the bullet can therefore be cleaned with toy cleaner, toy wipes, or with soap and water. The entire vibe is waterproof, thanks to little plastic caps that seal the wire connections on the end of the bullet and where the wire attaches to the control pack.
There are 4 vibration speeds, which are controlled by an up button and a down button on the control pack. Red LED lights light up next to the speed numbers, indicating the vibration intensity.
OK, now on to the fun stuff: my first impression of the Bnaughty was a good one. The plastic finish is velvety and soft and felt wonderful on my hands, nipples, and labia. The control pack, which is likewise velvety, is extremely ergonomic and feels nice in your hand. I put in the 2 AA batteries and cycled through all the vibration settings. It was a little loud on the highest setting.
The lowest setting was a nice warm-up. I worked my way up the vibration levels, inserting one end of the bullet a little (don’t insert all the way, though, without putting the bullet in a condom: you don’t want to tug on the cord and put pressure on the wires inside). On the highest setting, I came very quickly (like, in under 2 minutes). This vibe is great for clit stimulation: the plastic transmits the vibrations very well, so it wasn’t one of those vibration-levels-are-too-diffuse situations. On the other end of the spectrum, it doesn’t make anything go numb.
The seam on the bullet, fortunately, wasn’t difficult to clean at all. This bullet is not sterilizable, nor should it be used for ass-play (again, you don’t want to pull too hard on the cord). I can’t compare it to other bullets, since this is the first one I’ve ever used, but it was plenty powerful enough for me. I’ve used it several times and it hasn’t let me down. I brought it home over break and it was quiet enough to use at home (albeit after everyone else had gone to sleep, and not on the highest setting). I imagine, if I had a fan to cover the noise, or if I wasn’t at home and so terrified of being caught, the highest setting could be used discreetly.
Conclusion: this bullet is easy on the eyes, decently powerful, and easy to use. Good times.
So, I’m taking a leave of medical absence from grad school next semester. Because of this, I have to find a job. I have never had a job before. I don’t want a real-world job. I’m happy in academia, that’s why I’m getting a PhD. I’m working on getting a job as a teaching assistant, but everything is up in the air and I’m very anxious. I wish I didn’t have to do this, but I’m not going to enjoy what I do or be good at it if I’m still fuzzy from my antidepressants.
I’m actually having a panic attack about it. I’m going to take a sedative. Ugh.
Update: my abusive ex just e-mailed me and scared me, so now I’m really glad I brought that Ativan home with me. 
Update 2: One annoying thing about being at home is that when you retreat to your room crying, everyone wants to check on you (none of my family has any idea about anything that’s happened to me and I’m trying to keep it that way). Sigh.
I hope everyone who celebrates Christmas has a wonderful day!
<3 <3 <3
Well, I somehow managed to make it home, despite the fact that there was a *ground hold* at the airport I flew out of. It’s weird to say “home”, actually: I’m a grad student now, with a real apartment that’s technically “home”. But it doesn’t feel right to say that I’m now in “my parents’ house”, since it is the house I grew up in. Anyway.
I’m now home. I had forgotten how freakin’ COLD my parents keep the house. So, I’m cold and I’m a little miserable. I don’t know if it’s the holiday blues or what, but I miss my ex a lot. It’s totally screwed up: he abused me, and I’m still in love with him. Every time I think about him I cry, because of the trauma and because I still want to be with him. I want him back. I know it’s stupid, but I can’t stop feeling this way. If he came to me today and asked me to take him back, I’d do it in a heartbeat. I fantasize all the time about him wanting me back. I’m miserable.
It’s all a moot point, since he got rid of me as soon as he could. I still talk to him sometimes, and I think he’s sorry for messing me up so much. I don’t want to go into the details of why our situation was so traumatic, but he’s a really screwed-up person. Lots of bad stuff has happened to him, and it makes it difficult to be angry with him for what happened. I’m trying to move on, but I’m tired. I’m starting to think I’ll never get over it. I miss him a lot.
SIGH.
On a totally different note, the LayaSpot and the B-naughty came home with me. I’ll try to have a review of the latter up soon.
OK, I really, really like this vibe. Granted, I may be biased since this is the first vibrator with pulsation patterns that I’ve ever used: wow. I have a serious thing for blue, so I bought the baby blue/vanilla color, and it’s tres cute. It’s made of elasomed, which is phthalates-free and non-porous–yay! I tried it out after I had been outlining papers all day and had just had a very irritating conversation with my roommate, so I really needed to unwind. Layaspot did the trick!
Once I had the batteries in the right way, I found the controls to be pretty easy to use. There’s a red light under the +/- buttons that lights up when the vibrator is on. You hold down the + key to turn the Layaspot on. From there, you push the + button to increase the speed of vibration and the - to decrease it (duh). There are three vibration “programs”: a steady-state vibration program, a long pulse program, and a short pulse program. Once you’ve hit the highest vibration setting on the steady-state program, you start to cycle through the long pulse program, and so on. Unfortunately, there’s no kill switch, so to turn the Layaspot off you have to cycle back down all the way. Sad face.
What I really like about the Layaspot is that the tip can be inserted a little way into the vagina, stimulating the most sensitive part (the opening) while hitting your clit as well (and, crucially, everything in between). At it’s lowest setting, it’s almost inaudible, and at the highest, you can muffle it with a blanket (it’s nowhere even NEAR loud enough to be heard through a closed door). The elasomed is hard but feels kind of gentle. However, there’s no give at all. N.B. The Layaspot is supposed to be waterproof, but the seal on the tip of mine doesn’t look all that tight, so I’m not going to risk it. I may take it in the shower, but not in the bath.
So, after the fight with said roommate, I retreated into my room, scowling. I decided to read some erotica to cheer up. Once I was warmed up, I started cycling through the vibration settings on the Layaspot. The first two steady-state vibrations are pretty weak. I decided to stick with the highest steady-state setting, which I was very much enjoying. As I built myself up, I accidentally hit the + button and cycled into the pulsations. Oh. My. God. I came immediately. It was sooooo good. I can foresee using the pulsations a LOT. 
More experienced users seem to complain about the weakness of the Layaspot’s vibrations, so keep in mind that I’m a relative vibrator noob.
Cleanup was easy: I just used an Afterglow wipe (I adore these things!!!). Soap and water works, too, as well as your standard spray toy cleaner. This toy is pretty low-maintenance. I’ll post an update when I can evaluate the battery-eating capacities of the Layaspot.
All in all, I’m a fan of the Layaspot, kill switch or no kill switch. It may come home with me for the holidays.
So, I bought a LELO Iris and Nea off of ebay, and the seller seems to have taken my money and run. Doesn’t really look like there’s anything I can do about it, either. I am NOT pleased.
Update: The good folks at eBay have given me the money I lost towards a future purchase, so everything seems to have worked out alright in the end. :-) I honestly wasn’t expecting them to do anything, so it was a nice surprise.
I’m sorry about the lack of posting/reviewing the last few days, but real life is really getting in the way. Hopefully things should calm down soon.
In the meantime, I’ve written my first verified review for edenfantasys, and it’s been approved and put online!!! I reviewed the XXL Purple Twist, and I’m really excited it’s gone live.
My Eleven arrived! It’s *so* pretty. I’m really excited to test it out tonight (I’ve promised myself the break if I can get a certain amount of work done).
So, the saga of my status for next semester (and retroactively this semester) drags on. I’m feeling exhausted and overwhelmed and awful. It’s hard not to be able to do what you want to do because of medication. The thing that’s supposed to be making me feel better is making my life worse.
This *will* be a sex toy review blog and not a toygirl-whining-about-her-life blog. (Well, it will be *mostly* a sex toy review blog…) A bunch of the new toys I bought have arrived (still waiting on the Eleven, though) and hopefully I’ll have the time/inclination to try them out in the next day or two.